Books into Movies: The Winners

     You know that feeling when you're watching a movie and some annoying, pretentious kid in the corner mumbles "The book was better."  I'm that annoying, pretentious kid.  I'm hypercritical of movies that were developed from books because I view it like this: dude, it's all laid out for you.  No one has to put any time into coming up with original plotlines or characters, no cool, new places have to be thought up or created.  You just gotta stick to the text- cast some good people and maybe even mix in some special effects and whatnot, if you're feelin' tricky.  I love when movies accurately represent the books they're based on, so I decided to compile a list of movies that did the job well.

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe by C.S Lewis

Sweet special effects, no major changes to plot, and a hottay with a boday cast as the oldest brother.  The Chronicles of Narnia receives my full approval- I enjoyed the movie just as much as I did the book.

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by JK Rowling

I agreed with literally every casting decision made.  Dumbledore was perfect- wise and intelligent yet a little freaky, Harry was freaking adorable and, in my fourth grade mind, quite a lil hunk, Hermione was as bossy and bushy-haired as described, and Ron ideally completed the trio.  The music was epic, the special effects not overdone, and afterwards I found myself waiting for my Hogwarts letter. I actually still find myself waiting for my Hogwarts letter.  Thanks, JK Rowling.

The Virgin Suicides by Jeffrey Eugenides

This book was trippy and a little crazy but I absolutely loved it, and the movie made me love it more.  Seeing the characters come to life made me appreciate their complexity in a physical way that the text couldn't provide.  Kirsten Dunst rocks in this indie film, and the book is a must-read.

Pet Sematary and The Shining by Stephen King

The movies were just as spooky as the books, if not more so.  The casting was flawless and the music added insane suspense.  Not to mention Jack Nicholson in The Shining- dude blew my mind.  Amazing, amazing performance based on an amazing, amazing book.

So, what about you guys? What movies-based-on-books have you seen that you thought did justice to the original work?

Branching Out: Some Good*ss Poetry

     I have always loved poetry.  I view it as one of the most powerful and effective mediums to convey emotion.  Poetry is like music to me- reading a good poem has the same euphoric and exhilarating effect on me as hearing a new song I really like.  I was one of those Dr. Seuss fanatic kids- my mom always tells the story of how one year I sat on mall Santa's lap and, instead of asking for a Barbie doll or American Girl like a normal girl, recited the entire contents of the book One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish and was eventually ushered out of the plastic winter wonderland set-up by some very disgruntled elves.  Fortunately, my taste in poetry has matured, as has the audience I choose to share my findings with.  Which is why I figured you guys would be the perfect audience to share with :)

My Favorite Poem of All Time:

My favorite poem of all time is by ee cummings, who just happens to me my favorite poet of all time.  ee cummings is a weird dude- his poems are trippy and take some getting used to.  He completely shuns all grammatical norms and instead chooses to write choppy, nonsensical phrases with random capitalizations and punctuation marks.  And I love it.  How refreshing to break away from iambic pentameter, from those poems we read and write in English class with every third line rhyming and so on.  So, here it is:

i carry your heart with me by ee cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling) i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) Damn.  You've probably heard that before, and it still gets me every time.  I love everything about it- I love the emotion, the passion the poet feels made tangible to the audience.  It blows my mind. Next poem: XXXV by Emily Dickinson. I love Emily Dickinson.  Homegirl's a little crazy, but hey, she's an amazing poet.  I once read she didn't leave her house for like three years in a row.  And I'm okay with that, because she had some amazing poetry to show for it. PROUD of my broken heart since thou didst break it,   Proud of the pain I did not feel till thee, Proud of my night since thou with moons dost slake it,   Not to partake thy passion, my humility. There you go :) Hope you guys enjoyed these two gems.  And if not, stick to Dr. Seuss.

Everything I Wish I Had Said During Today's Question of the Day

     I hate being at the beginning of the alphabet.  And I'm doubly cursed.  Not only do many people find it clever to refer to me as Alcoholics Anonymous (left that little gem out on the nickname question of the day), but I am always first for stuff.  I'm already an oldest child and the only girl...how much more FIRST can I be?  The question of the day situation only intensifies this hatred- I am always one of the first to be put on the spot.  And then I have to listen to like twenty other stories which are way cooler than mine and remind me of about a thousand alternate, wittier, funnier, and ultimately cooler responses.  

     Today was a prime example of one of these occasions.  Favorite book.  And I brought up Harry Potter and Lolita.  Not that they're not my favorites- they're mentioned in this blog, for Christ's sake.  But of all the books I've read and enjoyed, those two do not accurately represent my taste.  Not that they're not awesome.

     If I could go back in time and edit my response (which is why I got so eager when Davin mistakenly called on me a second time), I would have gone a few different routes:

1) I am illiterate.  (Though false, this would have garnered a few laughs.  Hopefully.  Well, Lemmy would've laughed.  He laughs at everything.)

2)  Franny and Zooey by JD Salinger.  Ever since I read Catcher in the Rye, Salinger became a catcher of my eye (ha, ha).  But in all seriousness, I love everything Salinger does.  He is like a god to me.  His writing style is refreshingly unique and so precise and unquestionable and humorous and raw- his characters so gloriously real and deep and relatable, I am entranced by everything that man does.  And F&Z, though a short story, is one I can read over and over again and never tire of.

3)  Reading Lolita in Tehran.   As soon as Davin mentioned that I wanted to jump up and down and be like I READ THAT TOO AND IT WAS AWESOME.  But I practiced self-restraint in order to tell you here: I READ THAT TOO AND IT WAS AWESOME.  I had to read it for a school project and it absolutely blew my mind.  The writing was so beautiful- mellifluous, really- and the plights of the characters so grounding and incomprehensible, the book made me appreciate the beauty of reading so much, as an escape, as a bandage, as a means of social change.

4)  Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris.  Hannibal Lecter is one twisted dude that I cannot get enough of.  Hannibal is arguably one of the most intricately crafted villains of all time.  His intellect paired with his general creepiness make him fascinating to read about.  Harris' mind is twisted...he goes there.  Silence of the Lambs is dark and gory, but it makes for a quick and great read.

5) Twilight by Stephenie Meyer. HA- APRIL FOOLS!

Just Do It.

Excuses Not to Read:
I'm tired.
I'm on Facebook.
Jersey Shore is on.
My roommate is skyping and I wouldn't be able to focus.
I read an article this morning for my class- wasn't that enough?
My head hurts.
I probably won't process anything I read anyways.
I need to call my mom.
I have an exam Thursday I should start studying for.
I need to catch up on The Office episodes.
I'm online shopping for summer clothes.
I'm illiterate.
I need to work on Davin's multimedia project.
I don't remember what's going on in the book I'm in the middle of and would have to reread the last chapter.
Jersey Shore is still on.
That weird guy from work keeps texting me and I need to be fully alert to fend of his creepiness.
My friend just posted new pictures of her spring break trip to Mexico on Facebook.
I don't have a bookmark.
I should probably shower.
I should go to the gym.
I might sneeze and my eyes will close and I'll miss an entire paragraph and have to reread it.
I have to blog for Davin's class.
I have to comment on blogs for Davin's class.
I have to e-mail my Philosophy professor and ask him who the Hell Thomas Hobbes is.
I have to pray we don't have a pop quiz on Thomas Hobbes in Philosophy tomorrow.
I wish it was Friday.
I miss my friends from home and I need to send out a mass text message telling them that.
I need to verbally obsess to my roommate about that guy who's been playing mind games with me since first semester.
I need to text my new friends from LA101H and tell them I had an awesome time Friday night :)
I need to learn all the lyrics to Rebecca Black's song "Friday."


but in the end
I read
and I'm glad I did it.

Commentary for the Week: The Picoult Phenomenon

     Marriage problems, mercy killings, suicide, statutory rape, broken hearts and bulimia.  What hasn't Jodi Picoult written about?  Her books are wildly popular and have attracted a huge following among...well, everyone basically.  

     I was never a huge fan of Jodi Picoult.  I tend to shy away from mainstream authors, or at least keep my obsessions with their books on the down low (just realized that my previous blog entries aren't helping me out with this point at all- for the moment, disregard the Harry Potter and Twilight entries). When I first read one of her books, it was an earlier one called Vanishing Acts about a girl who discovers in adulthood that she was kidnapped as a child.  The plotline was gripping, the characters were unique and likable, and Picoult's ability to weave multiple complex problems and have them all tied up in a bow by the end of the novel renders her distinct from many modern authors who can barely solve their single, simple central conflict adequately.

     From there I moved onto some of her other stuff: My Sister's Keeper, arguably her most popular book, about a girl who sues her parents for medical emancipation when asked to donate a kidney to her sister who is dying from leukemia.  Original idea? Uh, yeah.  Picoult's protagonists are people who tend to screw up, lie about it, but ultimately be good people who just harbor a take-no-prisoners outlook on things and are totally unafraid to sue everyone until justice is served. The problems in their lives aren't usually ones that are encountered on a daily basis (at least, I hope not) but their responses to their problems are believable and realistic.  Take The Tenth Circle, for instance.  The protagonist, Trixie, a 14 year-old girl who was raped by her older boyfriend, lies to doctors about being a virgin and essentially fabricates certain details of the rape when speaking to officials about it.

     Picoult has a way of changing your opinion on characters at whim: one minute, the reader is rooting for the protagonist, and the next questioning their credibility on everything they've said throughout the novel.  Her endings are always surprise twists: she tends to take the character one would assume to be the least involved in a crime and make them the central perpetrator.  

     So, next time you're hitting up the local Barnes & Noble, stroll by the "Mystery" shelf and leaf through a couple Picoult books.  I'm sure you'll find something that will capture your interest.  Picoult is a certified mind-blower (and a Harvard grad school graduate, if you're interested in credibility).  

Bear WIth Me, Here

     Okay, so, for this week's post I'm going to deviate from book recommendations and make a confession.
     Hi, my name is Amanda.  And I'm a tabloid-aholic.
     Yes, it's embarrassing.  Especially for someone who started reading J.D Salinger's short stories in the sixth grade  (not to brag but I have to restore my credibility somehow).  Especially for an English major, for someone who I'd like to think can differentiate between a novel that is a complete piece of trash and one that is inspiring, moving, or provocative.
     I don't read teary Nicholas Sparks books.  I don't cave on beach vacations and buy a Nora Roberts book, self-consciously explaining to everyone its my "beach read."  My family, in fact, will never forget the summer I attempted to struggle through War and Peace on our annual family vacation in Florida.  So why, I ask, why would I, who loves Nabokov and Hemingway and even can sink my teeth into a Dickens novel and enjoy it, why would I like tabloids?
     Tabloids are sick.  They indulge in humanity's voyeuristic tendencies- they are filled only with gossip and useless information about people who are way more culturally relevant than they should be, and pictures expanded or shrunken in order to fabricate commentary on how fat or skinny a certain star has become.
     There is no gratification found in a tabloid, or there shouldn't be.  One does not finish, put it down, sigh deeply, and suddenly feel much more pensive, as they would with a good novel.  Rather, you feel almost hungry for more- more gossip, more glossy pictures, more facts and tidbits about events that have absolutely no effect on my life.  At least- I feel that hunger.  And that is why I am a self-diagnosed tabloid-aholic.
     What can I say?  People are interesting to me.  Especially people who lead lives I couldn't even fathom leading.  I am genuinely interested in what these people think, how they feel, what they're saying and wearing.  I do not live in a fantasy world- I am perfectly aware that while Kim Kardashian is trotting around in her Christian Louboutins I am attempting to patch over the hole that has appeared in the toe of my knock-off UGG boots.  I just find these people so interesting!  It's infuriating, really- tabloids are wildly overpriced and not worth it at all.  You cannot keep them as you can a book- the information slips into irrelevance the next week, or even the next day.
    I don't really have an answer as to why I am so affected by these glossy gossip rags.  All I can say is that an escape is provided similar to the way it is in a book- for about 80 or so pages, I can indulge all I want in a Hollywood lifestyle.  And I don't have to deal with the paparazzi.

Stephen King...Just Do It.

     Everyone has that one book series they turn to when they feel indulgent.  Like a piece of chocolate cake, that book is there for you when you're stressed, when you're sad, feeling anxious or upset, and you slip into it like a glove.  You're familiar with the author's writing style- so familiar that it seems, at times, as though they are writing only to you.  You soak in their every word, and the book is a source of comfort for you.  

     For me, that book is not one specific title, with one specific protagonist or villain or setting.  That book is any book written by Stephen King.

     Stephen King is not who most people would go to for their comfort reading.  His stories are gripping and suspenseful- the events that take place in his novels are often shocking and gruesome.  Stephen King goes there- he knows fear like Jane Austen knows dry, British men, weaving stories that are complex and terrifying.  Stephen King's stories are the kind of stories that keep you up at night, that make even the most bold toss and turn anxiously.  But to me, they provide a sort of comfort.  Sinking into a Stephen King novel  is akin to being wrapped in an old, familiar quilt.  To me, it feels safe and soothing.

     You're probably wondering what kind of a sick, twisted person I am to find comfort in pets being reanimated from the dead, in killer clowns.  The answer lies in Stephen King's writing style itself- his writing style is unique and engaging.  I have never read a book written in a style even comparable to Stephen King's- his writing is informative yet subtly beautiful- it is twisted at times but disarmingly complex and both smooth and choppy when appropriate.

     Stephen King is an immensely talented writer who has managed to continuously satisfy his readers by coming up with fresh, original plotlines.  His protagonists are always relatable, and his ability to make them feel accessible to the reader works to his advantage- the reader follows the protagonist's progression into insanity or paranoia and the ride is believable.  

     So, the next time you're seeking comfort, put down the Nicholas Sparks tear-jerker and the bowl of ice-cream.  Sink your teeth, instead, into something much more gripping.  You won't regret it.

Why Harry Potter is Freaking Awesome

     Harry Potter.  The name invokes some kind of a reaction, whether positive or negative, disdainful or praising, excited or decidedly complacent.  In some way, the boy with the lightning bolt scar has impacted us- whether it is because he sparked our interest in reading, or because we determinedly avoid everything related to this literary phenomenon.  Fan or not, I could care less.  I'm going to take this blog entry to remind you of a mere handful of reasons why Harry Potter has rocked my world since 1997.

1.  Hogwarts is sick.  Seriously, the Great Hall?  Platters upon platters of food that sounds amazing and is constantly refilling itself- count me in.  The moving staircases, the portraits that talk, the ghosts, the secret passageways, the sweet*ss common rooms and the fact that you need a password to get into your dorm (rather than an ID card or a room key, both of which I have struggled to keep track since I got them), the whole place just sounds incredible.

2.  Ron and Hermione are the coolest.  Ron is such a bro- he has an excellent sense of humor, is loyal to a fault, and has the craziest family of all time.  Hermione on the other hand is brainy but still retains a cool element- she always keeps her head and has an emotional capacity that triples that of the boys.  Together, the three of them form this group of friends that is definitely enviable- they are always in it together and epitomize the idea of true friendship.

3.  The villains are convincing.  Voldemort is a crazy-*ss motherfather, but I love reading about his antics.  His dialogue in interesting and original, and his rivalry with Harry is not overly drawn-out like so many other villain-protagonist relationships.

4.  J.K Rowling keeps it fresh.  There were no books in the series I considered "weak" compared to the others.  Each was equally "spell-binding" (ha, ha) and was comprised of an original plot and the addition of original, unique characters.  

5.  Harry Potter is the man.  He doesn't conform, he has been through a lot yet manages to keep his head up, he is goal-oriented, talented, athletic, and smart (okay, maybe I do have a slight crush on a book character).  

You get the picture.  Harry Potter is an amazing series that has impacted our society and grown into something of a literary phenomenon, and it's easy to see why.

Entry III

So, for this week I decided I'm going to mix things up a bit and instead of recommending a book, advise you to refrain from reading a book.  So, here's my DO NOT READ THIS book of the week.


TWILIGHT by Stephenie Meyer

DO NOT READ THIS BOOK.  DON'T DO IT.  IF IT'S TOO LATE, TRY TO ERASE THE MEMORY OF THIS BOOK FROM YOUR LITERARY REPERTOIRE.  IF YOU OWN THE BOOK BUT HAVE NOT YET READ IT, DONATE IT TO THE NEAREST USED BOOKSTORE OR BONFIRE PIT.  IF YOU HAVE NEVER READ THE BOOK, ACT OFFENDED BY MERE MENTION OF IT AND WEAR T-SHIRTS TO BOOKSTORES EXCLAIMING DRASTIC MESSAGES ALONG THE LINES OF "NEVER READ TWILIGHT, EVER" 

     Okay, so you may be wondering why I am so passionate about this.  I, Amanda Ascoli, have indeed read Twilight.  In fact, I got all the way to Breaking Dawn one particularly rainy beach vacation before I woke up and realized the literary crime I was committing.  It took my dad pulling the book out of my hands and reading an excerpt aloud to me before I realized how terrible the writing was, how unrealistic the dialogue and how ridiculous the characters were.  Twilight is some sort of odd literary crack.  It's as though Stephenie Meyer has roofied her readers so that they can't get enough of her mediocre writing, and, in turn, enough of Robert Pattinson's pale and sickly looking visage.  Don't even get me started on Kristen Stewart (1-800-TERRIBLEACTOR).  

    I'll give it to Stephenie Meyer- the chick is creative.  Her storyline is definitely...original.  Girl moves to depressing small town, girl meets boy, girl falls in love with boy, boy is vampire, girl meets other boy, other boy is werewolf and rival of vampire boy, girl is forced to choose between skinny pale guy and ripped tan guy (and makes the wrong decision, as far as I'm concerned), girl marries vampire, girl gives birth to vampire child, girl becomes vampire, former werewolf flame falls in love with vampire baby, everyone lives happily every after is not exactly a storyline we've all heard before.  So mad props, Steph, for your creativity.

    But come on.  Edward, the boy-vampire that has adolescents and middle-aged women alike swooning over his antics isn't even that great.  He's hyper-protective, in one scene going as far as buckling Bella's seatbelt for her.  Seriously?  If some guy tried to buckle my seatbelt for me I'd let him know what's up.  He basically forbids her from hanging out with werewolf hottie/super fun friend Jacob because of petty jealousy disguised as "looking out for Bella's best interests."  And Bella loves it!  She eats it up!  The hyper-protectiveness, all of it.  The coolest thing Edward does is drive a kick*ss car, and yeah, I get it, I wouldn't mind rolling up to my high school in one of those bad boys either.  But his controlling tendencies and over-the-top protectiveness are demeaning and suggest Bella is lesser and weaker than he is.  His constant worry about the her decisions is indicative of a lack of trust.

    And then...they get married.  At ages 18 and 17.  With no plans to attend college.  Cool, guys.  Oh, except I guess you're going to live forever so you'll have plenty of time to attend college...sweet.  I'm so jealous you're going to live forever and have to watch everyone you know and love die and you are possessive of super powers that give you a strength that can kill people.  Damn.  Wish I was a vampire...oh wait, I don't.  And then Bella, in a weird twist, gets pregnant, and the whole thing goes all vampire Teen Mom, all the while being written in a style that is elementary and over-descriptive.

   I think I've made my point.  Twilight...just don't do it.

Entry Nombre Deux

Kick@ss Book of the Week: Evening by Susan Minot

"She was pulling a rope out of the water and knew it was coming to the end when the barnacles started to appear and they became more think and clustered. Then it was strangely peaceful and the sound was turned off. She stood at the bow of a ship. If only she could have stood this way above the water and really breathed and let the waves go by like pages being turned and watched everything more closely and chosen things more carefully then she might have been able to read the spirit within herself and would not have spent her life as if she were only halfway in it.

For a moment she felt an astonishing brilliance and heat and light and all of herself flared up and the vibration after sixty-five years was not weakened by time but more dense then suddenly it was as if the flame had caught the flimsiest piece of paper for it flickered up and flew into the air then quickly sank down withered into a thin cinder of ash which blew off, inconsequential. Her life had not been long enough for her to know the whole of herself, it had not been long enough or wide."

Impressed?  Entranced? Engaged, enlightened, enthralled?  Cold and a little hungry?  If you are experiencing any of the aforementioned feelings after reading the provided excerpt from Evening, I sympathize.  Susan Minot’s writing style is almost liquid- it flows elegantly and effortlessly, her diction is exquisite and her voice distinct.  You’ll love this book, and if you don’t, feel free to use it as firewood or food (you said you were cold and hungry, I’m just tryna help a brotha out). 

I initially bought this book because I watched "Evening" late one night when I wasn’t wearing my contacts and thought the movie title was “Enchanted.”  When no one was singing or dancing, I caught on- this is not "Enchanted."  But its pretty freaking good.

When the movie ended, I saw every English major’s favorite words flash before me in the credits: “Based on the novel by _________.”  In this case, as mentioned before, it was Susan Minot, and I set out to buy the book right away.

I was not disappointed.  This book draws you in without being shocking or edgy- it has a resonating simplicity paradoxically coupled with a moving complexity.  The characters are original and memorable, the dialogue realistic and enhancing to the novel as a whole.

I’m not one for spoilers- ever since 2005 when I returned home from Barnes & Noble, overjoyed at the crisp new copy of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince I held in my hands, and received a call from a friend (after the events of that fateful day I refrained from using such an affectionate title to describe our relationship) asking had I “gotten to the part where Dumbledore died?”  Needless to say, I hung up the phone immediately and retired to my room, muttering some pretty aggressive things for a 13 year-old.  So, I’m not going to spoil it for you, but I will give you a bit of a “trailer”- the novel follows the life of Ann Lord, switching back and forth between her laying in her bed as an old woman, dying and typically in a semi-hallucinatory state, and Ann Lord as a young woman, attending the wedding of a close friend. 

**NOT A SPOILER** but more of a warning, or remarking: when Ann Lord is old, things get trippy.  The writing style changes and is very choppy and follows a streams of consciousness style.  It kinda freaked me out at first, because it appeared to bend the rules of literature my senior year AP English teacher had ingrained in me (her attitude was something along the lines of if its not Jane Austen, don’t read it, and if you intend to write something that wouldn’t be approved by an avid Jane Austen fan or Jane Austen herself, just don’t do it).  But it broadened my mind as far as how one can write, and write well.

So- read it.  Do it.  You’ll love it.

Entry Numero Uno

Got Passion?

    When I first heard we had to do a “Passion” blog, I groaned inwardly.  And a little bit outwardly, but then I disguised it as a cough.  Not because I thought the assignment was dumb- on the contrary, I thought the idea was cool.  As an English major, it’s no secret that I like to write.  It’s also no secret that I don’t do it nearly as often as I should, as it became evident when my mother pointed out that the last time I wrote something that had any substance and wasn’t for academic purposes was when I made a list of “Reasons Why I Shouldn’t Have to Pay for Gas and My Parents Should Instead.” (The list wasn’t even that convincing…I got bored after the third reason and abandoned all efforts, resigning myself to a summer of cringing every time I pulled into Exxon)  So, I knew this whole “blog” thing was a good idea.  The reason behind the groan was because I had no clue what the heck to write about.  After some serious soul searching (and by that I mean asking my roommate what my passions are, to which she replied “I don’t know…you always seem happiest the days you do laundry.”  After recovering from that crushing blow, I resorted to asking my mother, who kindly pointed out I have always had a penchant for making “really good grocery lists.”  Thanks, Mom) After several sleepless nights (exaggeration), I realized I do have a passion.  Reading.  I love to read.  So why not write about reading?  What I’ve read, how I liked it, what I recommend for others, what I’ll never read.  So here goes!

Entry #1- Kick*ss Book of the Week: Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov

      “Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta. She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita.”

Beautiful, huh?  Touching words from Humbert Humbert about his lover, the eloquently described Lolita.  Taken out of context, these words are poignant- a tender tribute to the woman the narrator is in love with.  Put in context, these words are disturbing- a tender tribute to the girl the narrator is in love with.  That’s right- girl.  Anyone catch the “four foot ten” snippet?  Yeah.  This chick’s not just unusually shrimpy.  She’s perfectly ordinarily shrimpy.  She’s twelve. 

    Why do I like this book/am putting my morality in question by recommending it to others? Not because I encourage relationships with twelve year olds.  That’s robbing the cradle in a way even Demi Moore is unfamiliar with.  I recommend the book because the writing is awesome.  Nabokov’s style is arresting- I could not put the book down.  To have the narrator be a monster and still keep the reader engaged is no easy feat- a reader typically keeps with a book because of a connection established with the narrator.  Nabokov keeps the reader’s interest though they (hopefully) cannot relate to Humbert, and are even disgusted by him. 

     So! Lolita.  Buy it.  Read it.  You won’t regret it.